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7/25/24

A Young Man's Hard Journey from Poland to Priesthood Here


       Notice: As of this date, July 25, 2024, this blog may be the last. If you have any--any at all-- last comments for the author of EXODUS TREKKERS,   please address them to  rrschwarz777@gmail.com. 
Thank You and God Bless You!   Bob





A Young Man's Hard Journey from Poland to Priesthood Here

An Unusually Candid Account of a Priest's Early Formation

" A living example of Christ in our lives," said a veteran church volunteer




This is another    in a series of interviews with  priests, pastors, missionaries and other heaven-bound individuals     interviewed during the ten-year run of this  blog Exodus Trekkers.  You can read the 130 other Exodus Trekkers posts on this web site,  now  being read  in more then 25 countries .

That Friday morning in July , Fr. Chris did not look like a priest nor  did that  small , dimly-lit room I now  entered . I did not expect to see this  forty-year-old man  in a sweat-stained T-shirt and overalls  giving soft-spoken orders to three workmen laying new marble tile for  an altar . I had come to hear him say morning mass and then afterward to interview him . The sanctuary was empty  and nearly barren, a scene of an ongoing do-it-yourself reconstruction of the St. Thomas Becket Catholic Church in Mt. Prospect , Illinois , a suburb  northwest of Chicago.

      
    Fr. Chris wasn't expecting me.  I had grown impatient with his repeated and terse  "Bob, I'm just too busy  nowadays for that interview ." We had become friends in 2007, 12 years a go ,  when he had been assigned to my church in nearby Arlington Heights. We hadn't seen each other since then,  and it was time to tell my readers of his inspiring trek from Poland to his ordination in America.
        
  He  saw me for a split second and left his huddle of workmen to shake hands with me. We talked for a few second; he obviously was anxious to get back to  work. He put a hand on my shoulder and said with well-measured sincerity, "Bob, please , I'm sorry…You know,  with all this work here…"  I nodded,  and replied,  "I'll email you some questions. replied,  He said, " I'll do my  best."
          Three days later he emailed me the updated  facts and comments I had requested   for this report.   
  


         
         
I      Our Story Begins…
     On August 2, 2003, a  23-year-old man disembarked at O'Hare International Airport after a 10-hour direct flight from Krakow, Poland. He glanced curiously around—his very first look at America—before being shuttled to the immigration line , then took a deep breath and appeared ask himself:  What have I done?

          This   apprehensive traveler with kind blue eyes and a jaunty walk was Krzysztof ("Chris") Kulig, and he had come to this country to become a Catholic priest. Though confident that his calling was from God, thoughts of his inadequacy pestered him. 
 While being herded through the airport's terminal he was confronted with a barrage of American mannerisms and speech that was, to him, alien babel. It painfully reminded that he knew no English and was,  in many respects, still a country boy from a small village in southern Poland.  He had forgotten that tomorrow was his birthday. 
  He then was comforted--he later told me--remembering what his mission was soon to be as the late Saint Josemaria  Escrivá  wrote in  "Love with the Church ":     A priest  is expected to bring love and devotion to the celebration of the Holy Mass, to sit in the confessional, to console the sick and the troubled; to teach sound doctrine to children and adults,  to preach the Word of God…[and] to give counsel and be charitable to those in need.
          Several minutes later, Chris ,  along with l2 other Polish seminary candidates who had been on the same flight, showed his visa to an immigration official. The group was greeted by the vice rector  of Our Lady of the Lake  Seminary in Mundelein,  Illinois . 
          Again  Chris breathed deeply.  Ahead  was six  years of studying  a language all of which was foreign to him. He would have to  read, speak, and understand it well enough to pass not only the seminary final  exams but also to serve effectively as a parish priest  among many families immersed in a wide spectrum of American culture.

  
         II    Growing Up on a Farm in Poland...   " I never thought I would someday become a priest  ,"   Fr. Chris told this writer in one of several interviews we had  in the spring of 2011. Growing up on a farm near  his hometown of Zegiesgtow,  there had been no "mountain top" experience , no voice from a burning bush like in the Old Testament to incite him.  But rather, he said,  this momentous decision to be a priest had , he thought, mysteriously and slowly evolved.
                      Close to the border of Slovakia and once part of a fashionable resort area known for its healing mineral waters , nearly everyone of  is Zegiesgtow's 1,200 inhabitants is Catholic.  The village today is farmland in a valley beneath  hills covered with pine and oak .  "We're lucky there because when storms come, these hills absorb them," Fr. Chris said.  His parents , Janina Skalniak and Adam Kulig  ,and his  three older  brothers  and two sisters still  go to mass each Sunday. "There are  no exceptions . "  
     Fr. Chris was  an altar boy who rose  at 4 a.m.  to catch a  5 a.m. train  for the 32- kilometer ride to high school. He was on the soccer team there.  His father was  a  government forester, as was his grandfather; his mother is employed as a cook at a  Catholic retreat house  .  "When I go home to visit ,  my mom plans a different menu for me each day . "  (His favorite is cheese-stuffed ravioli ) .
          The Kuligs are  a middle-class  family,  Fr. Chris  said , "yet  we always had bread on the table. "  He remembers when food was rationed during  his childhood in the waning years of Soviet-imposed  communism .  To deal with the shortage,  each of the Kulig children shopped at a different  store . " There was a time when there was no food in the stores . " He also remembers  being cautioned by his parents not to  say anything in public  against the government for fear of being reported by communist spies ,  who occasionally walked the streets.   " I remember the  revolution of  1989," he  said.  It was the year when the spirits of Poland soared because the Solidarity-led coalition government led by Lech Walesa  was formed,   leading to the eventual fall of communism.  ” But I was not concerned then about life difficulties because  I had parents to face any challenged."

III     Inspired by a Visit from the Pope...
    
      Inspired by   Pope John Paul II and  priests in his own parish,  the young Chris Kulig now wrestled with whether to become a priest himself.  His father wanted him to become a forester  and his mother  wished   her son to remain near home.  Procrastination  was fueled by  fear  of failure , of not making the grade at his  college level  seminary in Krakow.  Fr. Chris  explained how his fear of failure was to"  turn a curse  into a blessing  for me . "         
          That blessing  came soon after high school when , during the l999 canonization  Mass of St. Kinga in Stary Sacz,  Poland,  he heard  John Paul II say: " Saints draw life from other saints. "   The words struck a chord with  this  teenager .  "Without any delay," he was to say later, " I decided to be a priest."  He took—and passed—an exam at the  Pontifical Academy of Theology in Kraków. "My mother was shocked. "
          Reflecting on his four years of living in Poland   among 279 other seminarians and 72 priest instructors and his  first year being crammed into one dorm room with l4 other students, Fr. Chris  fondly remembers the dramatic body language of his Italian instructor and  the creativity of his cosmology professor ,  Michal Heller.  At first Chris he disliked  being  restricted to the seminary  building all day except for one hour, and for that he needed  permission .  "But I learned to like it later for the discipline it taught me. "     He failed a few  exams but found the studying not difficult. To  prepare himself to better defend the faith, he  read several  books by authors  who challenged the Christian Catholic  faith.    

IV      His  Critical Decision: A Priest in Poland or America ?

          In his fourth year of his  pre-seminary education , Chris  faced a  critical decision: whether to serve in  Poland as a priest or leave his native land for America  to help  fill the void there  of priests. His decision was influenced by  a visit to the seminary by Cardinal George of Chicago , who  came to Poland   to encourage seminarians there to consider being a priest in America.  He advised the college level seminarians that if they went through their final four seminary years in America instead of  in Poland, then their adjustment  to American culture would be much easier  .  The cardinal's advice was affirmed  in an exchange of emails between Fr. Chris  and a former classmate ,  then a priest in Chicago. 
          "Yes, Fr. Chris exclaimed in our interview , " I knew I would be leaving everything, my family and friends and coming to a new culture. It would be like jumping into a big ocean, and I didn't know if I would be able to swim well or not.  The  language was the big thing.  And  I would be greeted at  the airport by someone I had never met." 
          His diocese in Poland paid his traveling expenses, and now, on that August  day,  as he waited for the  immigration official to stamp his student  visa, the same thought flashed  again: What have I done?

V     The Real Struggle Begins...
         Housed in the Chicago  parish rectory of Our Lady of St. Carmel ,  he was given intense courses in English for a year  at the Bishop Preparatory Seminary and at the city  campus of the University of Illinois. "I  was  bombarded with English  five days a week from 3 p.m. to 9 p.m.  It was very difficult for me. Sometimes you just look at the teacher and ask :  what is she asking me ?   Vocabulary challenged him  the most,  made even more difficult because students were from different countries and could  not apply their newly learned  language skills by interacting with each other when outside of  class .  Administrators  purposely situated  Chris and the other Polish in environments where they were forced to communicate in English.
          " I really didn't have too much difficulty adjusting to the American culture, "
Fr. Chris said. "The only discomfort I felt was when walking down the street and I had to refrain from returning a wave or smile to a child—all because of the sex abuse scandal. I had smiled once or twice in passing a child and my friends told me "never, never  do that again."
          He was amazed by how "fast everything is in America…there is no time for spontaneity. Everything is by appointment. In Poland, for example, when an adult child wants to visit their parents, they just go to their home. "  Fr. Chris was equally surprised to discover that, unlike in Poland, supermarkets in Chicago supply  free paper or plastic bags and are bagged by staff.   But if Fr. Chris had  any epiphany   during those  four  years he studied  at the Mundelein seminary , it came with he sensed a  profound  difference between how Polish people struggle to overcome daily living obstacles—yet  in America " just about anything could be fixed . "

VI     Finally, a Priest  in a Chicago Suburb...

         
In his St. James office
In November of 2007, Fr. Chris was assigned as a  "transitional deacon" to St.James in Arlington Heights, an upscale suburb northwest of Chicago.  On weekends he lived  with  Pastor Bill Zavaski in a residential  home  next to the parish office.  He would later move permanently to an  adjacent home and share it with a priest from India.
          That next May,  Mr. Krzysztof Kulig  stood in Holy Name Cathedral in the Chicago Loop , waiting to become—for life—Father Chris Kulig.  In the pews were Fr. Zavazki  , his parents , and a sister ( who had traveled from Poland just for this occasion ) ."It was very beautiful . " I found myself  asking :  Can I really do it?  Can I really take that huge responsibility of being a priest. ? "
          Minutes later,  the  32-year-old  Polish immigrant approached the altar and prostrated his  wiry,   five-foot-eight-inch body face down on the cathedral floor. Parallel to him, with their faces also pressed to the floor ,were l3 other  candidates: four  from Poland , two from  Tanzania and Kenya, two from Mexico and Peru, and one born in Chicago.    "I will never forget how cold  that marble floor was. One of my classmates was crying and shaking….When Cardinal George put his hand on  me, I felt relief, I felt that the Holy Spirit was saying :  Don't be afraid .  I  knew that God's grace had brought me this far. "
          Soon he was being embraced  by his family. "I was so happy I cried. "  Later came  a celebration party for him at the White Eagle restaurant in Niles . " It was like a wedding."  Fr. Chris  now was one  of  more than 27,000 diocesan priests in America.
          His parents and sister listened to his first homily at St.James, a parish of  4,000 families and more than 80 different volunteer  ministries.  That Sunday he told the congregation how  grateful he was  to God for everything,  especially  his parents.  " I was nervous, so  aware that I was considered to be the new kid on the block , and was—and still am—learning English.  But I felt welcomed. I never felt that people looked at me through the prism of my nationality but at who I am as a person and how I treat them."
          For  his first  two years at St. James, Fr. Chris read his hand-written homilies from the altar. Nowadays  he says he  trusts in the promptings of the Holy Spirit to guide him  through his homilies.  He can't recall his sentiments upon  hearing his first confession other than he felt very humble—and says he still does when hearing them —and   acutely aware not to judge anyone.   " I knew that a priest can not be prepared for any confession because everyone comes to him with something different to confess. I knew  I had to give my personal understanding of that person, how I could help him or her be a better person, not to  dismiss the confession by simply saying to them :  ' your penance is to say  ten  hail Mary's. ' "   As for his first funeral,  he noted that he was wearing a white rather than a purple chasuble  as  worn by priests in Poland.

VII     Candid Remarks about His  Typical Priestly  Day...

Getting his mail at his home
in Arlington Heights, Illinois
 
          " Tell us all about your typical day at  St. James, " I asked  this Polish American  priest with the cropped  dark brown hair whose movements were characteristically quick when he   made room  on his desk for my notebook and voice recorder and then excused himself for a few seconds to  check his email .

          "I'm sure your parishioners would truly appreciate knowing  more about what a priest  does for his salary, I began."  We laughed at the tease and  again when I pressed him for what the parish pays him . He said $21,000 a year, a standard diocesan  salary, with no overtime for weddings, funerals, or unexpected confessions or late hour hospital visits . 
          "I'm not a morning person ," he said somewhat apologetically,  likely aware that I was at today's  weekday Mass  and he had been five minutes late. "I set three alarm clocks for 6  a.m.  but sometimes don't hear them,"  he admitted with a forced grin
      After  showering, he has a cup of strong Dunkin' Donuts coffee.  Commenting on his java brew, Fr. Joji Thanugundla, who shares the home with Fr. Chris, told me.  "I always tell him the coffee tastes better when he makes it. And he takes good care of our house and the yard. "
          After presiding over the 7: 30 a.m. weekday mass,  which he usually does  twice a week, he goes to his home office to check emails. At 8:30  in his  home, Fr. Joji  and Fr.  Zavaski  and he  pray their required   Divine Office  ( three Psalms, the canticle of Zachariah, and petitions for families and the deceased whose funerals are that day ) .  Fr. Chris doesn't eat breakfast.  He's off now to the  parish office ;  there might be a funeral or a  Bible study he leads from  9:30 to 11.  He lunches at home , usually on leftovers from last night's dinner prepared by the priests' cook, Angie , a parish member who prepares the meal  in Fr. Chris' home. The three priests eat together.  His afternoon may entail  a parish staff meeting from  1 to 3, followed by a one-hour break.  Evenings are often occupied with some kind of church meeting . "Every day is different…. When I'm really fatigued,  I tell the office I won’t be back for an hour and then  I just go to my room and rest, unless I have a funeral or have promised to see someone. "
        
  Fr. Chris is usually home at 9 or 9:30 p.m. and unwinds by watching the animated TV show " Family Guy" or a movie which he selects  from a subscription service. He may read a novel or something humorous.  "Sometimes when you're preoccupied with your work and getting a bit depressed, laughter is needed….Sometimes I call my old  Mundelein  seminary friends and we might talk for hours." Depending on his energy level at this late hour, he might listen to  an instructional CD and practice his English pronunciations.
          He finds the late evening hours the best time to prepare for   Mass the next day. In the summer, he enjoys the "inspiration" of insect sounds at night. e reHH In  the "Magnificat ,"  a monthly subscription missal read by Catholics throughout America , he reads a  meditation before going to bed. Lastly,  he prays the following:
                             Thank you God for this day. Give me the strength for
                                          another day and keep all my friends and my family in
                                         your care.

          At this particular interview , Fr. Chris extended his hand to me. "You see this ring on my finger? It's a Rosary ring my mother gave me when I entered the seminary in Poland. Many times  while falling asleep, I touch this ring and say the Rosary and pray to my Holy Mother in heaven. I also remember my mother on earth. " 
          Looking at the ring again, Fr. Chris' voice rose an octave as he explained  what role the ring plays at weddings. During the ceremony, he takes it off   and cautions the groom never to take off his ring as a convenient excuse to feel free from his marriage vows for an hour or two  when out with the men some   night at a bar. "Keep it on and you will be free of temptation,"  Fr. Chris exhorts  the groom. 
          He hears confessions from 3:30 to 4:30 p.m. on Saturdays in the parish center."  Many times though, people just telephone me and ask if they can seen me." He views a confession "more like a friendship, a conversation between someone I don't know but to whom I must relate."  Most of the people he sees in the confessional booth are St. James members and of all ages; men slightly  outnumber women , and   he rarely hears a confession from a teenager.  Many  confessions  begin with a question about morality  or a  request  for advice on daily living, like:  "Father, I'm not sure I'm on the right path "  or the question: "Did I say the wrong thing to my spouse ?"  With marital problems, Fr. Chris keeps people focused on love and  marriage vows. Fr. Chris himself goes to confession twice a year:  at  Christmas and Easter.  For private prayers and meditation he occasionally drives to the church at Marytown in Mundelein  and walks the grounds amid the beautifully landscaped Stations of the Cross. 

VIII     Up Close and Personal
          Recreation.…"I'm reading Jesus of Nazareth by Pope Benedict . "  He also  reads the magazines "Archeology" and " Discover ".  He loves barbecued ribs and seldom goes out to eat because , he says,  "I have a great cook. " Once every three weeks or so he gets a haircut in Mundelein from a woman barber whose been cutting his hair since his seminary days there. A camping trip to Yellowstone  National Park was his favorite vacation in America,  but "next time I'll stay in a hotel. "
          Friends…When he needs to "vent," he telephones former classmates or talks to Fr. Zavaski , whom  he considers a close friend "to whom  I can open up to…whether he agrees with me or not, he has that gift of listening well. " Says  his home-sharer , Fr. Joji:  " Father Chris and I laugh, we share, we discuss—all in good spirit. He  is friendly and very responsible."  Another close friend, Sr. Joanne Grib of the nearby  Sisters of the Living Word convent, describes him as " a deeply spiritual man who has a deep respect for all people . He's a gentle , kind man who is a  dedicated priest . We have a lot of laughs together. "  With a laugh she added: "We  both love movies, and as much as we'd like to go to a movie together, we  wouldn’t want to scandalize the parishioners."  Sr. Joanne consults with Fr. Chris when organizing   her Bible classes.
           Political leanings… He chuckles at this , then thoughtfully comments: " I try to follow what the candidates are saying and disagree with them sometimes.  Does he favor Democrats or Republicans ?  " A little of both," he answered.
          Milestones in his life…The many people who have "helped me  see  the way in life. "
          Celibacy… " When I visit my family in Poland and see my nephews running around, it is sometimes painful knowing  I can not have biological children. But I married the church."
         
          Major needs of St. James parishioners…That "they experience the presence of God in their lives and the treasure of the Catholic church. " He is working with the parish council on the issue of parishioners needing to learn more about their faith.  This is not an easy task, he explained,  because  of the mix among parishioners who are  traditionalists (  those who want to see the church return to some of the pre-Vatican II practices )  and of modernists  ( those who  want greater freedom in how they express their faith  ).
          What disturbs him as a priest…Church leaders—both clergy and laity—who openly criticize Cardinal George and others in high leadership positions without knowing all the facts about an issue. It saddens him when people don't proclaim  Jesus Christ as head of the church but would rather proclaim themselves or their own particular church as the final word.
          Agreement with what the church teaches… He has personal opinions but chooses  to "obey "  church  teachings. ( After this interview, Fr. Chris during his  homily at  next morning's  Mass , exhorted everyone  to go home and think about their "obedience to Christ , "  not to  obey what they personally prefer  to obey.  He cautioned his parishioners that although  people interpret church teachings differently , due in part to the natural changing of  human language as time passes, the spiritual language of the church remains the same and is universal. )
          What drives him…" I'm trying to be as humble as  I can.  I hope people don't read me as arrogant.  I just want to present Christ the best I can as a young priest. "  Again his words seem to echo those of St. Escrivá :  A priest is no more a man or a Christian than any ordinary lay person.  That is why it is so  important for a priest to be deeply humble
. 
          IX     How He  Battles Against  Satan...
          Fr. Chris  is candid about his own temptations.  " Sometimes there are doubts about things you do , things that make you sort of empty."   When this occurs, he is helped by meditating on the life of the saint, Padre Pio, who helped many people  battle  evil.   " I know I am vulnerable …and sometimes I pray again and again in that moment of temptation, asking God to give me wisdom and strength. After I have been victorious in overcoming the temptation, then  the important thing is that I be  grateful to God. "
          Our interviews  of several hours ended with  Fr. Chris relating what he described as his "worst experience ever of  doubting the presence of God in his life."  He grew increasingly emotional as  he told the story  of when  his youngest sister, Anette, 23, flew from  Poland to visit him in May, 2010.
          Fr. Chris had been  summoned to the immigration office at O'Hare, where his sister  was being held and  disallowed from entering this country despite possessing a legitimate visa.  She had landed at 4 p.m. and had been interrogated while detained  five  hours before Fr. Chris arrived ;  he was not allowed to see his  sister, who was being held in an adjacent room.
          Fr. Chris   was promptly  accused of  lying to immigration  officials two years ago  when  he requested  that the two-month  visiting permit of his sister,  who was then  visiting him ,   be extended five months.  The reason for it, he had told officials,  was that he needed his sister to care for him while recovering from a broken  ankle suffered in a recent automobile accident   in front of the church. The extension was granted, but officials now were accusing him of concealing the fact that  the real reason  for the extension was  to give his sister ample time to find employment in America. Fr. Chris denied the accusation.
          Knowing that he and his sister—he was never allowed to see her—were separated by a wall and that he was absolutely helpless to do anything for her,  was perhaps the most agonizing moment in his life , he said .  " They didn't even tell me that they were going  to put her back on the plane to Poland for another ten-hour flight . And they did ! " 
          He  went home . " I cried like a kid, asking God : Where were You?   " I doubted that  God existed if he could allow  that to happen."    He said he burned with anger  from the unfairness , the insensitivity , the gross mistrust of  those particular  government employees.
           "For the first time in my life I was so weak.  Then I looked up at the crucifix on my  bedroom  wall .  In that moment  of pain, I realized how helpless Christ was when he hung there on His cross, helpless like I was. I offered up all my pain to him then and knew it was a victorious moment."
          "I try now   to  visit my family every year, " he  avows. "

          At his farewell mass at St.  James on June 3, 2012 , the choir sang  in Polish, " Radujcie sie w Panu " ( Rejoice in the Lord ) . Fr. Chris then addressed  the congregation:   "You welcomed me at my first mass here as a stranger and then loved me as your own."  Diane Adam , a veteran St. James  volunteer, described Fr. Chris as a  "living example of Christ in our lives."


     In 2012 Fr. Christ was assigned as associate pastor at St. Thomas Becket church in the adjacent suburb  of Mt. Prospect  and became its  pastor three years later . The church has 300 registered families and  conducts a Sunday and a weekday mass in Polish. He says he has no regrets about not being a priest in Poland,  "I am a happy priest in America .  "

The priest is a man anointed by tradition to shed
                                      blood , not as  soldier, through courage, not as
                                      the magistrate, through justice, but as Jesus 
                                      Christ , through love. The priest is a man of
                                      sacrifice; by it, each day , reconciling heaven
and earth , and by it, each day, announcing to
                                       every soul the primordial truths of life , of
                                       death, and of resurrection .
                            --Fr. Henri-Dominique,  O.P.

The End



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