A Report by Robert R. Schwarz
On November 5, 2022, Lewie Beck and his father Bob and I sat down in a pew for the 5 p.m. Mass at St. James Catholic Church in Arlington Heights, Illinois. For the next hour I could stop looking at how the 38-year-old severely crippled son and his 73-year-old father with dementia expressed their love for each other. Father and son often held hands, especially during prayers, and Lewie repeatedly leaned his head on his father’s neck , and his father responded with a smile for his son. I looked closely at Bob Beck and saw no dementia in that moment—though when the Lord’s prayer was said, he struggled to get the words out, life-long Christian that he was. Lewie said the prayer loudly.
My thoughts, my heart remained on the Becks for the rest of the day, especially that day 30 years ago when Lewie, then eight years old, and
The Hellish Wounds of the Accident Healed with a Heavenly Prayer
At age 14, Lewie wrote the following which appeared in the summer issue of the Rehabilitation and Childhood Trauma newsletter:
" At the Kensington and Windsor crosswalk we [ his sister and he were returning to school after lunch ] went to cross the street but we didn't make it. Boom! We were both hit by a car." [ According to Maureen, Lewie's mom, the crossing guard did not see the car nor did the driver see the two children .] "My mom and Katie [another family member ] were riding their bikes to meet us when they saw two figures in the middle of the street. My mom got hyper when she saw it was us. An ambulance was called and we went to the hospital. "
" All of my family came and wept over me…" [ When Lewie came out of his coma, a nurse asked him what did the words on his Bart Simpson tee-shirt say. Lewie accurately replied : "Aye caramba, dude ! " The room erupted in laughter.] Slowly I began to improve…Parts of my brain were injured and couldn't do what they used to . I had to relearn many things , like walking and talking. "
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| With deceased mother Maureen |
" Sometimes I feel frustrated when I can't retrieve the words I'm thinking about. Some people still have trouble understanding me. I have to repeat myself a lot… Because it takes me a longtime to talk, people sometimes turn away while I'm still talking."
" I can't write very well because my right hand shakes too much, and my left hand is so slow that the rest of the [school ] class is onto something else before I'm done writing one word. Even my legs shake ,and sometimes people think I'm kicking them."
" I wish I didn't have an adult with me all the time…. It's a real pain having someone with you everywhere you go , every second of every day."
"If I hadn't been in the accident, I'd be just like everyone else…But importantly, I'm alive…My prayer for all of us who have fallen in life is to pick yourself up and start all over from where you left off. "
An Intimate Conversation with Lewie’s Mother
During an interview with Lewie and his mother eight years ago, I had asked, him what pleased him the most in life. "Just waking up pleases me,” he said. “When we go to sleep we know that the next day may be our last." His mother described her son as "happy go lucky," but Lewie admitted to having downtime. “He badly wants a wife and kids “ said his mother . “He gets depressed when he realizes that's improbable.” She turned to her son with a mother's smile and said, " But we don't rule anything out, do we Lewie ?"
Perhaps Lewie's darkest hour occurred five years ago when he had to break off a romantic relationship with a woman also afflicted with traumatic brain injury as he was . Both at the time were patients at a rehabilitation center in Wisconsin. Lewie turned silent when his mother summarized the affair.
I asked Lewie if he wanted to talk in depth about his faith life. He nodded approval. Had he ever lost his faith in God ? " Not really," he said, obviously unsure about his own answer. His mother suddenly stood up , saying tactfully, "I think I should step out for awhile. "
When she did, Lewie continued, his face reflecting painful thoughts. "I knew the Lord was there." He paused, tears now on his cheeks. " I just didn't know where to find Him. It was much easier to find Him before the accident. "
" Are you angry with God for allowing all this to happen," I asked.
" No. Things happen."
" Do you pray?"
" Yes. Silently."
Maureen smiled affectionately at her son. " I have to make some observations about this faith topic ," she began. " The one remarkable thing that Lewie does which few people can is—" . Her son finished his mother's remark with—"touch people's hearts."
" It's amazing, " the mother continued. "I've seen him interact with real tough guys, and he brings out all their softness. He seems to emanate God's grace to people and cuts through all the externals. It's like a heart-to-heart experience. "
I asked Lewie if he thought some people had been blessed just by knowing him . He uttered, "yeah."
Mom then related a scene that climaxed our interview : When Lewie was 15, his mother's sister, Catherine , suffered a stroke and now lay in a hospital bed surrounded by her entire family . Lewie hadn’t yet arrived. " We were all so uncomfortable, " Maureen said. "No one could give my sister much eye contact. No one knew what to do. Well, Lewie walks into the room and immediately locks eyes with my sister. He was the only one there who could do this. He had suffered so much in his life that in this moment he was the only one who could really be present with her. What happened next was so moving and powerful, you can't explain it. Lewie seemed to be sending out all this grace, and my sister was drinking him in and Catherine began to glow. It was like she was saying, finally, someone here who will engage with me ! "
Silence fell upon the three of us at the Beck kitchen table. Maureen finally said , "I've seen this happen time and time again, where Lewie sends out comfort like this. " She told of the time when Lewie, when attending a special healing Mass, went up to a young girl with a traumatic brain injury and hugged her. “The girl’s face glowed,” Maureen said. “Those are the moments when I know why God allowed all this to happen."
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| With friends selling fund-raising El Salvador coffee |
Nowadays, Lewie…
...helps a professional caregiver take care of his father, often holding his hand , talking to him—even though his dad doesn’t reply much--, and changing a television channel for him. Father and son also watch live-streamed daily Mass.
“I just love his relationship with his father”, says Vicki, the caregiver. A close family friend frequently drives the Becks to various doctor and other appointments.
What challenges Lewie ? " Keeping busy," he said. He told me of the two European cruises his aunt and grandmother have taken him on and his desire to go Rome and see the Pope. He graduated from high school, and until the scheduling of multiple classes became unmanageable after two semesters, he attended the University of Wisconsin. He would like to read more books but his visual mobility is impaired.
Back to the three of us at Mass…
When the donation basket was passed to the three of us, Lewie pulled some coins from his pocket and dropped them in. Several minutes later, each of us were silently giving thanks to our Lord after receiving Him: Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity in the Holy Eucharist .
The End
comments welcome at
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© 2022 Robert R. Schwarz
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